Los Angeles-based alt-rockers Fast Friends are KX FM’s Artist of the Month!

We asked the eccentric and secretive band to share with us a recipe they love to make, and band member Ryan Spraker took us on a step by step journey on how he likes to prepare the classic Korean dish Kimchi, complete with the unique philosophy and wit only an indie-rocker could provide.

 

FAST FRIENDS – HOW TO MAKE KIMCHI

  1. Acquire lettuce

  1. Use knife to hack at lettuce until it’s in many many pieces

  1. Put many pieces of lettuce into a large bowl with enough water to cover it

  1. Subsequently add enough salt. In this case I went with 1/4 cup

  2. Let the lettuce soak (for 1-2 hours) and most likely becomes far too salty and gross

  3. Finely grate ginger into a bowl. Don’t know how much/who cares at this point

  1. Do the same thing with garlic again ‘who cares because no/gods no masters’

  1. Be super bad at cutting stuff and totally over it while cutting carrots into matchstick-sized pieces, but also you suck at cooking either way, so grip it and rip it

  1. Put all that stuff with a big bowl with the ruined lettuce after attempting to drain/pressing all the liquid from lettuce 

  1. Oh – very integral step is to also add like 4 or 5 teaspoons of Korean red chili flakes called Gochugaru

  2. Use your hands to mix it all up… noice

  3. Pack the slop mix into mason jars as tight as possible and press down. At this point you’ll notice it’s already looking pretty garbage but YOLO

  1. Leave about an inch of room at the top for the gas from the fermentation to do something or whatever… idk I ain’t no science nerd 

  2. Put on covers but not too tight because supposedly it’ll explode but I’ve never seen that happen (seems super suss 2 me)

  3. Store for 2-4 days in the same place that The Traveling Wilburys suggest you store your DX7 synth “In a cool dry place”

  1. Feel certain it’s not gonna be good and you should’ve tossed the lettuce from the get go

  2. HIDE YOUR SHAME

THAT’S HOW YOU MAKE KIMCHI!!!!!! 🎊 🎈 🎉